Saturday, March 26, 2011

Glee's Original Song Episode: Worst Moments

In this episode, most of what I called “worst” was actually kind of great.  Whether it was reaffirming why a character deserves my hatred, or suspended the plot for the sake of a great musical number, even though they were the worst moments I wouldn’t have wanted them to be done any differently.  

Kurt looking totally bored, and even annoyed with Blaine and the warblers. 
I mean, good for him for not mooning over the guy after he rejected him, but it still seemed a little odd.  He said that their number was “nothing new.”  I disagree; I loved the percussion they added, I thought that part WAS new.  I dunno, maybe I’m cool with Blaine getting all the solos because I know the actual vocalists (The Beelzebubs of Tufts University) aren’t shown on screen.  So I’m over it; none of those other on screen faces will be featured.

Quinn’s inner monologue
It’s no wonder why I hate her.  Her priorities are foreign to me, and she seems to not understand how much women can achieve.  Here she is thinking, “You’re smarrrrt, and super PRETTY, and relatively SANE for a girl.”  And then later, “Prom queens live, on average, 5 years longer than regular people.”  Wow.  So that’s how she justifies her priorities.  Longer life span?  Aye yi yi.   

This is a Kangaroo Court!
It cracks me up how froo-froo the private school boys act.  Here they are arguing over whether they should wear their traditional blazers or go wild and crazy and wear red with blue piping instead of blue with red piping.  OUTRAGEOUS.  Why do the writers make the Dalton schoolboys so flat and stereotypical?  It makes it a little TOO predicable that Kurt won’t be there forever.  There will be no missing the Warblers when they’re finished on the show (other than their music, of course). 

Kurt as the chosen one
So great for us Kurt fans, but it was totally out of the blue that they all accepted Kurt as the one to sing with Blaine.  I get that they’re all Blaine lackeys, but really?  The Blaine-butt-kissing goes so far that they don’t even ask to audition when he says he wants to sing with Kurt?  Or is part of it, as Finn said earlier to Kurt, “I don’t think I can sing to a dude.”

Wasn’t I the one who supported Rachel’s crazy original song idea?
Yeah, that was cool, by the way.
Poor dumb Finn as usual.  Didn’t see a red flag that his always conniving love interest publically supported an idea that she believes to be crazy. 

“It’s called Big Ass…Heart”
First of all, I’m not exactly sure why Lauren liked this song better than Fat Bottomed Girls.  Yes, it’s a compliment to be told you have a “big heart.”  But it was pretty clear that that’s not ALL this song was about.  “When she shops for groceries, her heart gets its own cart…When that big ass heart flies coach it has to pay for 2 plane tickets.”  It was a really fun song, and I really enjoyed it.  I just don’t understand her reaction. 

“I’m sorry Kurt, this must be really upsetting.  It reminds you of your mom’s funeral, doesn’t it?
Give me a break!  He just compared…not just the death of a human to one of a bird, but the boy’s MOM?!  Blaine, REALLY!?

What were your least favorite moments?

Friday, March 25, 2011

Glee's Original Song Episode: Best Moments

This was a fantastic episode.  It better be, because it was the final before their (MUCH too long) hiatus.  Here are my favorite moments of the Original Song episode.

Kurt admitting that he’s jealous
Even though it seemed odd for me when Kurt criticized Blaine for hogging the solos, I give him props for admitting it. 

Rachel’s second song writing attempt. 
First, Rachel calls Finn back in to hear it, and she hands him a box of tissues, “Just in case.”  LOVE her confidence.  Especially when he basically told her to get a life the last time.  Then the song’s conclusion, that she’s “the only Berry on my family tree,”  Had me laughing.  And finally, if the chorus didn’t give it away she explains to Finn, “It’s called Only Child.”  “Yeah, I got that.”

Although I thought it was a little odd the way Kurt lost it over the canary dying, I looked past it because I feared the other Warblers would think he was a jinx for killing their mascot.  And his line, “I know we need to practice doo-opping behind Blaine,” was classic catty-quippy Kurt.  Again, I was disappointed he criticized the guy he’s crazy about (especially publically!) but that beautiful solo it lead to made up for it.  How I’ve missed Kurt solos!  And it was so pretty, even in his alto range.  He hasn’t sung that low since Melancamp. 

The Blaine-Kurt kiss
Finally!  I love that Kurt said, like, nothing.  Just drank in Blaine’s touching speech.  So sweet. 

Schue asked the kids what their favorite song is.  The kids rattle off many classics, and Brittany offers:  “My headband.”  “And what are all these songs about,” Will asks? “Headbands.”  How can you not love Brittany? 

“Do you want to know how this story plays out?  I get Finn; you get heartbroken.”
And then Quinn goes on to say how they will have mundane lives and all Finn will amount to is taking over stepdad’s tire shop.  Not that there’s ANYTHING wrong with owning a shop; I think Burt is a successful guy, but can’t Finn have and attain his OWN dream?  He’s not bright but he has a way with people.  Rachel sees that and fosters it.  Quinn just uses  him.  No likey.  At least she alludes to the fact that Rachel’s destined for bigger things.  And she almost sounded like she was giving her advice on how to find happiness.  But still ouch.  One of the most powerful moments of the episode, I loved it.  Quinn is one of those characters you just love to hate. 

The judges
I cringed SO MUCH when they showed the nun and conservative!  Sue had just said she created a songlist tailored for them.  So suddenly I had the rest of the show written in my head.  Here’s the outline for my never to be written fan-fiction:
  • Aural Intensity sings lots of songs about Jesus.  The judges love them.
  • The Warblers come on stage and Blaine and Kurt sing a tender duet, exchanging meaningful looks, and the judges rant about how wrong it was.
  • The New Directions song goes okay, but when they find out about the unfair treatment of their former classmate Kurt, they protest.  Maybe quit the competition, or something.  Maybe even Sue quits too, because Sweet Porcelain is the only kid other than Becky that she seemed to like at McKinnley. 
  • I get sad that the New Directions performance was going to be overshadowed by, well, non music type subplot taking over.  Even though it would be cool to see them reach out to Kurt like that.
Well, in the 2 minutes it took me to come up with that storyline, Aural Intensity’s song about Jesus was over, and we learned that Sue was wrong, and she did NOT have a majority of pious judges.  Nun and former exotic dancer?  Haha.  I kind of love it when I’m wrong.  This show does an awesome job of keeping me guessing.  (Though I was right about the Jesus song.  And the nun DID sort of pick on the “gay school, or school that appears gay.”  Kathy Griffin’s character did too, obviously.)

L is for gLeek
Kurt whipping out the foam loser fingers was pretty much the highlight of the show.  The whole audience doing the gLeek loser fingers, wow.  What a fun logo and subsequent product placement THAT was!  And then Mike Chang (by the way, why does everyone have to refer to him by first and last name on the show?  They’ve even got me doing it now) wheels out the Slushie cart.  It took me a moment to get the joke, but WOW.  Really clever. 

The win
Obviously.  Rachel hopping around, Sue looking like she sucked a lemon (and subsequently punched the presenter).  The “loser” kids being vindicated and enjoying victory after wanting it so badly.  Yay. 

Rachel got her star. 
And by unanimous vote, wow.  The two things she’s always wanted.  Acceptance from her peers, recognition for her talent, and the symbol that she’s always associated with it.  Very touching.  She didn’t get the guy, but what she did get was pretty huge.  And I really like that.  The show is mostly about romantic relationships, and I do feel invested in them.  But it was pretty great seeing that that’s not the be all and end all when it comes to high school life.  

What were your favorite moments?

Thursday, March 24, 2011

Glee's Original Song Episode: Funniest One Liners

“I’m going to write an awesome original heterosexual song”
This made me chuckle.  Santana just has a way with words, and can make anything sound angry and funny.

“I don’t even remember putting that in there”
Maybe Brittany should start making a note of when she does and does not fill her locker to the top with dirt?  Or just look over her shoulder to see if Sue’s standing there with a smirk. 

Wait what’s it called? 
“Trouty Mouth”
This song is HILARIOUS.  So sultry, but offensive.  And Sam’s so horrified!  Then Mike looks over at him suppressing a laugh.  This was even more awkward than “Fat Bottomed Girls.”  At least Lauren seems proud of her curves.  Sam is self conscious through and through. 

"Whoa.  Scary Quinn.  All right." 
She so deserved that.  Although I have to say, as much as I hate Quinn, and hate that now she’s using Finn for the prom couple votes the way she used him for a baby-daddy, I have to agree with her on one point.  Secret relationships?  No thank you.  Sparing some other girl’s feelings?  It does the opposite.  And it says bad things about Finn’s commitment.  Not that I want him to be with Quinn, but still.  Two wrongs don’t make a right.  Cut her loose already.

“My hairdresser (Shatnerian pause) is a gay.  And he’s been with his partner for 15 years, and he is also (pauses again) a hairdresser.” 
Pretty sure this is a very old joke, but the delivery of it was cute.

"I had to Twitter that Obama’s a terrorist." 
"Oh no you didn’t!"
I love that they put Kathy Griffin, a gay icon, in this conservative role.  The irony made it ten times funnier than if they had a randomer.  The only way this could have been better was if Tina Fey had been available. 

“My husband is verbally abusive and I have been drinking since noon.  I’m bored, let’s just see who won, huh?”
Way to build up the moment!  I love that it’s become a running joke that the Regionals judges and staff either don’t care AT ALL about the proceedings, or they focus on everything but the singing ability of the groups.  Here the kids are, caring SO much, and it just goes so show, winning doesn’t matter.  It’s the journey.  Oh crap, now I’m quoting the Schue. 

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Glee's Original Song Episode: Did You Notice?

This is the first episode that had so many little extras in it that I felt compelled to separate out the "Did you notice" into its own post.  Maybe it's because it is the final show before the hiatus, but it seemed like it had extra layers throughout.  So, when you were watching this episode of Glee, did you notice:

Copyright infringement
Sue raises an interesting point in this episode, regarding “My Chemical Romance” sending cease and desist letter.  I’d just read a blog about high schools and copyright infractions for their performances.  I wonder sometimes how social media impacts the show.  Using “Furt” for the shippers, “Frankenteen” for the Tweeters, etc. 

Where did those candles come from for Kurt and Blaine’s number?

Raise Your Glass
When Kurt “Raised Your Glass,” he had his pinky extended!  Ah ha ha!

Get it Right
Rachel’s song started out as haunting as Amy Lee, before going Broadway.  Not that there’s anything wrong with show tunes!  But it was such a great surprise at first. 

I’m not 100% sure, but I think they had the actor who plays Karofsky in the front row.

Number one
Not all the “loser hands” had the thumb extended.  Some were just “Number One” hands.  Aww, disappointing. 

Rod Reddington’s title was simply, “Gadabout.”  Um.  What IS a gadabout? 

Did you notice those things too?  Anything else pique your interest that I missed?

Saturday, March 12, 2011

Glee's Sexy Episode: Most Controversial and Confusing Moments

This episode of Glee was slightly controversial, but for me, it was also pretty confusing.  And since I think that controversies typically occur when things are not cut and dry, I'm naming this Glee Episode Chat "The most controversial and confusing moments of Glee's Sexy Episode."  I hope you readers can clear some things up for me. 

I don’t really understand what the song "Landslide" is about.  Brittany asks “Is that really how you feel?”  Is WHAT really how you feel?  Landslide = losing control, right?  The line, “What is love” has to do with questioning her sexuality, I assume.  I get the sense that Brittnay understands that Santana is confused, because to me the song is about confusion (but also hope).  So why does she seem so happy when they finish this song?  Because Santana is thinking about it instead of still being very surface?

Sapphic charm? 
This was controversial because some feel it was homophobic for Rachel to be flippant about a song about lesbians (and actually, IS the song about lesbians, or just sung by them?), but I didn’t see it that way.  I think Rachel was being condescending in that line, but that’s just how she is.  “I know a big word: Sapphic.”  “I’m all into theater, brava brava.”  It wasn’t an eye-rolling moment for her, and I don’t think she was making fun of Santana for being gay.  It seems to me that Rachel is very much into civil rights because of the way she was raised: a proud (and litigious) gay, biracial, Jewish family.  On the other hand, I was a little surprised Santana knew what the word meant (I didn’t).  I guess it’s entirely possible that she’s spent time looking around online and came across it.  I’m surprised Rachel knew it.  Sure her dads are gay but that doesn’t explain it really. 

Our girlfriends are such good friends; I wish we were that close. 
Sam’s new, so all right.  But Artie knows that Brittany fools around with Santana.  He was there when she revealed on the phone, “If sex means dating, that would mean Santana and I are dating.”  Sure enough, Artie gave Sam a SLIGHT look.  So I’m wondering:  is Artie cool with this?  Does he know that they still fool around, or does he assume it’s ended since they’re in a committed relationship? 

Don’t put a label on me.
Some people are angry that Santana admitted that she loves Brittnay, but she refuses to admit that she’s a lesbian or bisexual.  I say give her a break.  She’s a kid.  It’s still confusing for her, and it doesn’t help that the girl she’s interested in is dating a boy.    

Santana:  And Brittany, I can’t go to an Indigo Girls concert, I just can’t. 
Brittany:  I understand that.
These lines are part of a very sensitive, emotional scene, that Santana is coming out.  And if it was anyone else, it would seem to me that they were speaking metaphorically.  But the combination of Santana being a confused kid, not terribly smart, AND really edgy, I found it funny.  Like she was literally saying “they are so lame and if I have to like them in order to be a lesbian then I don’t want to be a lesbian.”  And Brittany supports her, in my mind, as if to say “Well obviously, they’re awful.”  I love when the writers leave things like this up to the audience to figure out exactly what way it was intended.

Do you understand what I’m trying to say?
I also don’t understand why Brittany says she doesn’t understand what Santana is trying to say, when she says she’s angry that she has all these feelings for Brittany.  Obviously Brittnay’s dumb, we get that.  But she DID seem to understand with the song, which I don’t think I grasped the full meaning of!  I mean, I know a lesbian sings this song, and it’s a lesbian anthem of sorts, but I don’t know exactly what it’s about.  I think it’s open to a lot of different interpretations, although it’s ultimately empowering. 

And what of Brittnay?  What IS her deal?  She’s bi, but Santana is gay?  (I know, I know, Santana doesn’t like labels.  Sorry).  Is the story going to go into polygamy?  Brittnay seems open to that, Artie is either fine with it or in the dark that they’ve continued seeing each other.  I don’t think there’s any way Santana can handle it though.  No WAY.  She’s been loose with the boys up until this point ("Do what I do: never say no").  But now that she’s been vulnerable and put it all on the line for Brittnay, only to hear “I love you BUT…” there is no way she’s going to want to share.  Even when Santana was not dating Puck she was possessive.  She’d be more so with the one she loves.  

What do you think about each of these scenes?  And can anyone out there help me out and explain more about "Landslide?"  It was a beautiful performance, I just feel like I'm missing something in my ignorance about the meaning.  

Friday, March 11, 2011

Glee's Sexy Episode: Best One Liners

As expected, Glee's Sexy Episode delivered plenty of funny one-liners.  Here are my favorites:

Emma:  For those that are terrified of the hose monster…
Oh dear.  If she wasn’t interested in getting a bit of hose monster, why did she marry the guy?  And also, how is it that she’s perfectly comfortable admitting this to the teenage girls she’s paid to help?  How does she not see that she needs some help? 

Wait, cucumbers can give you AIDS?  Seriously because I just had some on my salad for lunch.
I guess it makes sense that the kids of Lima, Ohio were confused.  I assumed part of the reason Quinn got pregnant was her religion doesn’t allow birth control.  And I’ve met some pretty ignorant young people (a guy in college who had no idea where babies come from).  So this DID seem funny and not over the top silly to me!

Brittany:  I know I’m pregnant because I saw a stork outside my window…
I know it’s Brittany.  But how did she not know about this stuff after Quinn’s ordeal?  Really?  When Brittany said this I wanted to say to her, “You KNOW the writers already covered that story arc, there’s no way you’re pregnant too, sweetie.”  The only funny part of this bit was the horrified look on Rachel’s face when Brittany was explaining. 

Holly:  “Is it true you thought you got your girlfriend pregnant via hot tub?”
Finn:  “I have always been dubious.”
I can’t help but think that he meant to say “oblivious,” but once again his poor vocabulary failed him!  Is it just me?

Sue:  Sweet, sweet porcelain
SECOND time Sue’s called Kurt that, haha.  I miss when she used to call him “lady.”  I didn’t think he minded, seeing as how he kept going over to the girl’s side every time Schue called for a mashup.  But ever since he reported the bullying I guess she realized this was maybe crossing a line.  And somehow this is more of a compliment.  Maybe.

The Lima Bean 
When I first saw this poster I didn’t get it.  It’s a coffee shop.  Shouldn’t it be a coffee bean, not a lima bean?  And then I got it:  Lima, Ohio!  The name of the coffee shop that Kurt and Blaine frequent is the Lima Bean!  So cute! 

Puck:  "Three chicks and me is just a typical Saturday night in the Puckerman bedroom, it’s not the best balance for singing."
Enough said.

Holly:  "My lips are sealed, just like your legs.  Kidding!  God, that was rude.  See a real doctor would not have said that."
When Holly said that first line, I was appalled.  But when she ADMITTED that was rude, I cracked up.  At least she realized it!

Lauren: “Nerd.” 
Puck: “Whoa!  Why you gotta hate?”
I just love Puck.  

Puck:  "I like you Lauren.  I like wooing you.  Next to dropping my afternoon deuce it’s my favorite part of the day."
It’s the simple pleasures in life, isn’t it?

What were your simple pleasures from Glee’s Sexy Episode?

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Glee's Sexy Episode: Worst Moments

 It's never a good sign when my "worst of" post for an episode is double the length of my "best of" post for an episode, but I'm not going to gloss over the problems of the series.  In a way I like the problems of the show almost as much as I love the best moments of the show.  That's what makes the show so unpredictable.  And when it comes to drama, things shouldn't unfold like clockwork because life can get messy, and people make mistakes.  So here are my worst moments of Glee's Sexy episode.

Will forgets Emma’s name
Really?  I know Holly has legs up to her neck and is wearing a short skirt in this scene, but that was super dorky. 

And speaking of STDs, how is your dating life
Really, Holly?  Is that the best you can do for a pickup line?  I mean, I’m all for being safe and responsible and opening lines of communication, but he should at least buy you dinner first.  I dunno, maybe I’m being old fashioned.

Holly calls Rachel frigid
This was disgusting.  Along with using “Do You Wanna Touch” to help teach sex ed and giving Artie a lap dance.  These are kids.  Shame on you, Holly. 

Meeting the girls in a warehouse with perfect risers
This isn’t the first time I watched Glee and thought, “Wait, WHERE are they?”  Did I miss something, or did the boys invite the girls to an abandoned warehouse?  And the girls lined up perfectly to hear the introduction before the rave started…it was all very, very strange.  And the scaffolding just happened to make perfect risers for the guys to dance on.  And where did the balls and bubble machines come from?  I couldn’t get into this number.  Too surreal, even for Glee. 

Afternoon Delight
Why did Carl sing this song with Emma and the kids?  Emma didn’t know what it meant but he did.  He just kept quiet about it until AFTER he sees Holly explain to Emma that it’s about a nooner.  Come on. 

Blaine going to Burt’s place of work, talking about gay sex
I put this in my “best of” list too, for different reasons.  Although it was big of Blaine to want to help Kurt, WHY would he go to the shop for this discussion?  Seriously?  He knows where Kurt lives.  I’m guessing he has the house number.  And even if he didn’t, he couldn’t say, “Hey Mr. Hummel, I need to talk to you about Kurt.  When do you get off of work?”  Gay or straight, a car shop (or any public work place) doesn’t seem like the right venue for a coming of age discussion. 

Santana’s rejection
I HATED (in a good way?) when Santana got vulnerable and Brittany told her that yes, she loves her, but she loves Artie too and won’t break up with him.  I hate it.  I like that we get more character development from Santana, I like that she’s not just one dimensional: angry, and she’s so mean that in a way it’s nice to see her get a slap in the face.  But I don’t want her going soft.  I don’t want her mellowing out.  I don’t want her to become withdrawn over a broken heart, and now she has no one.  Sure she could stay with Sam for appearances, but she already knows that’s not working.  And she can’t heal because Brittany is stringing her along now, saying if things don’t work out with Artie then sure.  Ugh.  One of those moments that had to happen; if there was no conflict in the show it would be dull, but it was uncomfortable viewing.

Puck:  I used to think not thinking about consequences made me cool, but now I think it makes me a loser.
Again, character development is great, but we have Santana AND Puck going soft at the same time?  First Sue, then Quinn got mushy and settled down with Sam, and now this?  I dunno.  Who’s left?  I want an angry, spiteful character or Glee will not be the same.  And if a character with a Shakespearean name like Puck stops being the loveable villain it’s not looking good. 

Rachel:  She decided to take the hour dedicated to Celibacy club to fix her sham of a marriage. 
Word really does get around.  How did Rachel learn this?  And while we’re on the topic of this Celibacy Club scene, when did Brit and Artie join?  And, well, everyone?  I know, in season 1 most of them were in it, but it was just Rachel and Quinn the previous meeting so this seemed discontinuous. 

Prom king and queen pillow talk
At least Finn smelled a rat, but still.  BOO QUINN, BOO!  And did you notice when he asked, “that’s not all this is about though, right?”  She didn’t say “of course not, we’re together because I love you.” She said “I made a mistake with Puck.”  Well duh.  But that didn’t answer the question.  And she did choose Sam so Finn’s getting sloppy seconds after he dumped her.  Finn:  you’re dumb.  Sweet, formerly an upstanding guy, but such a sucker.    

What do you think?  Were these as cringe-worthy for you as they were for me?  Did I miss any of the worst moments of the show?  Let me know.

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Glee's Sexy Episode: Best Moments

This episode had some great moments.  Guest star Gwenyth Paltrow as the substitute has some off the wall methods, but proves that deep down she wants to help the kids.  Burt continues to be super-dad to Kurt.  And the developments between Brittany and Santana provide the main plot for this episode.  So here are the best moments, in my opinion, of Glee's "Sexy" Episode.

Too Risqué Even for Holly Holiday
I LOVE how smooth Holly Holiday was when she interrupted Puck and Lauren doing their…research.  She didn’t miss a beat when Lauren said how when you look as good as her you want to flaunt it.  She applauds them for their ambition.  But she does not pull her punches when she tells them that they are underage and this is therefore illegal. With a name like “Holly Holiday” I’m thinking there’s a reason she seems so comfortable and learned when it comes to the pros and cons of this sort of videography… 

Blaine going to Burt’s place of work, talking about gay sex
It was really big of Blaine to go to Kurt’s dad over his concerns.  In a way it made me sad that he was this mature instead of wanting to “teach” Kurt in time once he was more comfortable.  This seemed more platonic and not romantic and that’s a shame. Also funny was Burt looking around nervously, clearly cringing at the thought of one of the guys hearing this conversation. 

Santana getting weepy during Landslide
The first time Santana broke down like this was when glee club was nearly canceled, and the New Directions sang “To Sir, With Love.”  I cried as she sang “You taught me right from wrong, and weak from strong.  That’s a lot to learn.”  She’s become overcome a few times since then: when the whole group ganged up on her for being mean all the time, when she got drunk at the party, and now that she sang a meaningful song to Brittany. 

Papa bear does it again
I thought Burt’s sex talk with Kurt was really amazing.  When Kurt told him to “educate himself,” I though he was being harsh, but Burt proved me wrong.  Good parents can do just that.  He talked to Kurt about respect as well as the fun time.  “It’s worse because with 2 guys they’re both thinking it’s just fun…But it does something to you, to your heart, to your self esteem…Use it as a way to connect to another person.  Don’t throw yourself around like you don’t matter, because you do matter, Kurt.”  Beautiful. 

Makeup (or method acting?)
I love how tired and upset the girls looked during the Landslide number.  The dark circles, the drawn faces.  So moving and hard to watch.  Stevie Nicks said in a behind the scenes interview that she wrote it as a young woman (25) looking at her whole life ahead of her.  So again, I think the song is more about confusion than answers.  And these girls both looked like this was really hard for them.  But when it was over, Brittney was glad that Santana was willing to admit she was confused, and not all cool and edgy. 

Will ends up with Holly
Oh don’t get me wrong, I want him and Emma to somehow get back together.  I just don’t understand how that's going to happen because I don’t like the idea of a quickie divorce nor do I like the idea of adultery.  But regardless, it's good that Will found a rebound relationship since Emma hurt Will.  Emma needed this thing to happen as a reason to get jealous to help her figure out what she wants.  So just like the Emma and Carl aren’t working out, the Will and Holly thing won’t work either, of course (does anyone really believe for a minute that Gwenyth is going to give up movies and become a TV regular?).  At first glance this couple doesn’t even make sense because she doesn’t at all seem to be Will’s type.  Just compare sweet, tiny lamb Emma with leggy, in your face Holly.  However, they do both have a quirky side.  Plus they both do have a fire inside for helping the kids who really need it.  So I am starting to get it.  Still won’t last though, hah.  

Your thoughts?
What did you think of each of these developments?  Did you have any other favorite moments of Glee's Sexy episode?  Let me know.

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Glee's Blame it on the Alcohol Episode: Best One-Liners

This episode was certainly controversial, slightly uncomfortable to watch, but very funny.  Here are my favorite one-liners from the episode:

One liners
Sources say that this joke has been done before elsewhere, and it will probably be done elsewhere because it’s just that obvious.  But it doesn’t make it any less funny.  And Figgins is such a great character to deliver it because he’s so out of touch.  “Just listen to any song by Kee-Dollar Sign Ha!”  Will:  “Uh, do you mean Ke$ha?”   

Preemptively check into rehab
I love when Sue goes on one of her tirades.  The more misguided, the funnier.  “Will. I suggest you preemptively check into rehab.  As you area  future alcoholic.  I mean, come on.  Look where you are.  You’re coaching a Glee club that can only beat choirs of old people.  You’re rehashing the detail of your failed marriage with the very lemur who rejected the bestial horror of your craven sexual advances.  And when my Glee club crushes you at regionals, well the last ounce of meaning will drain from your life and you will turn to drink.”  Will (and Emma) just doesn’t even know how to respond to this.  But the strangest thing is when he actually DOES turn to drink at the advice of Beiste.  He can’t say Sue didn’t warn him.  And boy does she punish him later for not heeding her words.     

I’m okay, don’t worry.
This bit was definitely a nod to Monty Python’s black knight scene.  Sue goes to visit Westvale High to “volunteer her help” with their show choir since she loved her time in New Directions so much, and tells Will, “Unfortunately the chipper homosexual who coaches Aural Intensity had a terrible fall down the stairs.”  This was because after she pushed him down them, instead of staying down and awaiting medical attention, he got back up and said, “I’m okay, don’t worry!”  So she ran down and pushed him down the next flight.   

Rachel:  “They left me alone because I’m responsible.”  Puck:  “They left you alone because you suck and you’re a total bore.”
Tsk, Puckerman, Puckerman, Puckerman.  Moments prior to this Rachel was his “Jewish American princess,” but the moment she put the Kabash on the free booze he turned on her.  He really is a bad boy.

“Hold on, is this song about your headband? …it’s really…interesting but it’s not emotional, or, like, good.”
Good old Finn.  Just like Burt, he doesn’t really have a way worth words.  But at least he’s honest.  (Other than where Sam’s concerned, but otherwise a real standup guy.)

“It’s Santitney and Artcedes”   
I LOVE these split screen phone scenes.  They were all discussing Rachel’s party, and threw the fans a bone with this line.  The couple nicknames are rampant on Glee forums: Finnchel, Puckleberry, Fuinn, and so on.  Just as the writers did with naming and episode “Furt,” this one was just for us. 

Conflicted men
Kurt is trying to explain to Rachel that as a lover of musical theater, having a gay best friend can be very rewarding, but that doesn’t make him boyfriend material.  “I’m doing you a favor by telling you that Blaine is the first of a long line of… ‘conflicted’ men that you will date that will later turn out to be only the most flaming of homosexuals.” 

Don’t ask, don’t tell
“I sat through that whole Brokeback Mountain thing.  From what I gather, something went down in the tent.”  I know it’s the Midwest, but really Burt?  Really? 

“I wish you all a happy and healthy alcohol awareness week.  Unfortunately, Kitty Dukakis couldn’t be here, due to disinterest.”
Figgins was in rare form tonight!  More observational humor that just goes to show how out of touch he is. 

“Guys, I’m really nervous.  Ke$ha’s been a culture icon for weeks, and I really want to do her music justice.”
I’m a little surprised they made a dig at Ke$ha…actually two digs if you count Figgins’ butchering her name, on a night when they featured two of her songs!  The amazing thing was the fact that most Glee fans agree that Brittany did Ke$ha songs better than Ke$ha.  At the very least the dancing was far superior. 

The alcohol teen vomit fetishist
If there’s one thing funnier than Sue’s one liners, it’s her monologues, and she had more than one great one tonight:  “We all still quake in terror at what we witnessed yesterday at the assembly.  Via Glee club, spiraling out of control.  My nose is still filled with the acrid stench of teen vomit.  And there is simply but one person to blame.  The alcohol-teen-vomit-fetishist, Will Shuester.”  I forget just why she hates him with SUCH a passion, but wow.  Just wow. 

Quinn:  “That’s a fair amount of the pot calling the kettle black right now.”  Brittany:  “That is so racist.”
Mercedes is too dumbfounded to speak when Brittany whispers that admonishment in her ear.  Quinn was trying to make the point that Schue had just gotten drunk so it’s hypocritical for him to tell them not to (nevermind that he’s of legal drinking age and they are not, but whatever). 

“I’m going to get a new boyfriend out of this who can keep up with me vocally and in the future give me vaguely Eurasion looking children.”
Say what you will about Rachel Berry, but she is a planner.  She knows what she wants and she goes for it.  She knows that if you shoot for the moon and miss, she’ll end up among the stars.  So even though her pursuit of the gay Warbler didn’t pan out, despite how great it would have been for her, at least she gets a song out of it.

What were your favorite one liners from Glee's Blame it on the Alcohol Episode?